Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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