So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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