Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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