dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
