Define "chronic" masturbator.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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