I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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