In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
