I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
