great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
birth control should be required to get into college
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
