You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
