AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
being pregnant is like rehab
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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