Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
