I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
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