I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
We left an ass print on the piano.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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