I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
