...so i touched it.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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