He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
