I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
she looked like the before picture.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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