Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I have already put on my inside pants.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize