He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
