you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
