If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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