So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
He kissed a someone with a penis
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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