Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
