How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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