Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
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It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
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You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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