We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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