we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
