I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
