ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
