Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
