Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
