Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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