I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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