if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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