we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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