I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
