i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
