His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
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