his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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