tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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