you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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