well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Let's get the cat blown out
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
