haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
