She announced her abortion via fbk
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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