Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Even my vagina gasped.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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