So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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