Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
