Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize