Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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