I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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