at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
