do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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