my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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